I’ve just returned from a collaborative writing weekend in Eastern Oregon and I feel completely refreshed! There’s nothing like a hot, six-mineral soak twice a day overlooking the snowy Steens Mountain Range with a bestie.
I highly recommend retreating to the middle of nowhere with someone you adore. It’s especially good for a Hermit who loves people. If you’re in Oregon, this rustic joint is right off the highway. We loved it!
Isn’t it intriguing, what comes up when you completely empty out the surface details in the first hour and then get to the real deals?
Questions about why we do what we do, who we are (there were personality tests taken and loud guffawing laughter), and what brings HOPE to a person’s weary, fearmongered, sometimes chronically lonely heart.
People. We are becoming chronically lonely? I do not think this is a good move for humanity, do you?
The cure for lone wolves is to remember that wolves are seldom loners for long. They don’t prefer it, contrary to the old rubber stamp maxim. They rejoice in their packs. There’s no need to go it alone when what our hearts deeply desire are love and belonging. One of the most powerful things I can think of is wanting to know someone’s heart.
Say it: I’m grateful to know you that way.
Imagine it being said to you. How does that feel? Thing is, we’re not likely to hear it if we don’t allow anyone to know [said heart]. Opening is risky. It’s even scarier when the world is sending a million text messages a minute to our high-alert nervous systems, fragmenting our attention and imploring us to shut down and “be careful”.
We can meanwhile continue to connect in all of the ways we can, in all of the ways we’re *willing* to stretch ourselves, and (wo)manifest ways to connect IN PERSON. This virtual business alone isn’t cutting it.
Tell me what you think. I always want to know. And tell me how you love connecting with your heart, because I forget that there are many ways in which you’re opening and risking for love that I’m not aware of.
HA! I LOVE how the Universe works. I have been rereading Women Who Run with Wolves for the umpteenth time. Last night I read a short passage about being lonely. The cure of course is to return to your pack and reconnect. I’ve really been watching this (wo)manifest in me over the past year. I nourish and fill my well by being alone, but it can get lonely at times, even around people who are NOT part of your tribe. Gathering in-person is becoming super-important. To me, the connections online are wonderful with so many women I adore, but it doesn’t cure that loneliness. YES! to more circles, more gatherings, more women coming together in-person!
Aho, Beautiful and Wise One, I’m grateful and honored to know YOU that way! Thank you for your encouraging words this day.
this so speaks to me….
often I have found myself in a conversation…with my self about virtual gatherings and whether or not I should step into that path…after all I have found life long sisterhood in the virtual space of SouLodge, Soul Craft and a few others…but every time I think I “should” my heart, my blood, my bones say no. I am about being “in the flesh”, very clear that I can only lone wolf it for periods of time, but then I must connect. I am clear that this is my calling in this life…to bring women together live. There is a gift in the virtual and I have been blessed to find such places as your Pixie, were integrity and honour are held high…but I have experienced that those qualities are not held everywhere…
Physical connection feeds me in a way that allows me to go deeper, easier and also come face to face with myself, as we are always mirroring each other…coming together in the flesh allows me more opportunity to see and be my self more clearly…being in the presence of other sisters, and brothers…is community and community has a bigger impact on the world and I am part of this world, not just my self…I suppose you could say I want to be more than the drop…I want to be the ripples that follow, as well…. Love and Light dear sister xox
Looks heavenly!Just planned my Montana winter hot springs get away today. With the holiday season upon us I’ve been thinking a lot about this concept of loneliness and human connection. We’re a couple of decades into the digital age and I’ve been watching the barometer of our humanity slip in exchange for perceived convenience for years. What are we really losing? True connection with our fellow earthlings for one thing. It’s no joke to say hosting a dinner party and getting people around a table in real time is now an act of preserving the wild. That’s one way I try, as often as possible, to keep people human. Last Imbolc we had a poets dinner. My friends really stepped up and exposed their glorious beauty when I asked them all to recite from their favorite works after dinner. It was raw, wild, true, sexy, free, at times hilarious and dare I say, even rebellious. All of it made more endearing because of the vulnerable exposure of our true hearts. People can be so amazing when we let them. Truly magical.
Thank you Pixie for this. I’ve been digesting much about loneliness and while I agree it’s reaching epidemic proportions even with all the “connections” today, I also am watching a loved one drop deep into loneliness fast. Related to recovering from a necessary surgery so there’s trauma and shut down happening too but bigger than that – it’s tapped an underlying loneliness and I’m reaching farther than I ever have for them because I can see what’s happening, I can, and I want too. I’m calling in all the grandmothers for some creative solutions here as this is new but all connected to old surgeries as young child – intense yes. Is it also necessary that they find a way to get their hand up and teach too? Or do I just on the floor with them and wait protectively or at the door and wait? Rhetorical Pixie- so not expecting you to know this – just hearing you and thank you for more to chew on… excited for class in January! Much love-Jen
Hi Pixie,
Great blog. I am a hermit who craves community and it is HARD sometimes, finding with and connecting successfully with community. Chronic loneliness is indeed a problem.