The Promise of the Wounding

If one were to fill out an application to get the job of being a mother, significant experience would be required in the areas of nurturing, protecting, empowering and initiating babies and small children. Unfortunately, the most important job for humankind is a no prerequisite situation. For this, there are many costs.

A mother wound is an internalized injury which occurs through a lack of nurture, protection, empowerment and/or initiation by the mother or caregiver who is responsible for the child’s growth, development and health. Click here to see who has a mother wound.

Cultural lack of emphasis on these four fundamental areas, mothers’ inabilities and/or unwillingness to be available to the child during infancy and developmental years, increased societal pressures to have both parents working away from the home, class separation/socioeconomics, and an increase of single parenting have influenced our adult lives dramatically.

It is easy to ascertain that because values and practice around child rearing have undergone major changes since industrialization, mother woundings are quite commonly blamed for many struggles today. Where do we begin to address them?

It helps to think of healing as a spiritual practice to treat strong emotions which inform illness.

It may help to believe that there is a promise held inside the wound:

When acknowledged, honored and given voice, a healed wound bears the resilient scar of experience, knowing, growth and wisdom.

I began working with my mother wound in 2003, when a debilitating miscarriage caused a wave of grief to sweep over me, shining a floodlight on the trauma held within my family of origin. Clinical and traditional therapies, a decade of shamanic training and energy healing in circle with women my mother’s age, fifteen years of giving and receiving bodywork, bringing to life two children I promise to stand by for all of their days, 4 consecutive trainings in parenting communication and personality disorders, + establishing no-contact with my mother have really helped.

I think this work is of utmost importance because when the mother wound is activated, we and everyone around us is hurt and affected. Relationships diminish in joy, strength and longevity. Souls dim down. Purposes are not lived and fulfilled. Hopelessness, anxiety and depression are disabling. Compassion is withheld. Earth is dishonored. Faith in the infinite is compromised.